Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Just lifting your fingers as if a call for help, sometimes, when in the midst of everything and yet seemingly nothing at all, and you try to feel what’s left, sometimes just pain possibly so real, its physical. Tried to be alright without help, and walk like its okay, knowing possibly, things could just be in your mind and they’re unreal yet they don’t seem convincing when all that’s familiar is the piercing rejection deriving from a direction you’d never expect. Possibly, things had just been a mistake in the midst of a state when you’ve been over occupied. Yet as days go by, taunting thoughts and questions whether anyone out there believes in you just causes plain shivers. And it’s even more dreadful facing a you, ambiguous of what’s to do right now, at times. Knowing only so little with so much unpredictable aspects around…

And today, you just wished to have an understanding, that you’re not perfect. To have an understanding that you really weren’t aware and still can’t be too sure of what you’re supposed to be aware of. To have an understanding, that from the beginning, you didn’t expected anything like this to be ever possible of happening. To have an understanding, you didn’t mean to come as a pain and will walk away to cease this. To have an understanding, that if this is still the wrong move, that you’re still just trying and figuring things out, one at a time.

And you know, that you can’t demand acceptance, you can’t control reactions, and you can’t fulfill everybody’s perfect situation.
But you just want someone to hear you out. That you’re all the same as anyone else. You’ve done wrong, but you need grace and someone who believes in the best in you all the same. And you know, even this you can’t demand but just be evermore appreciative because of this and because of this, you are reminded of how to forgive.

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